You know you're really lonely when...

You check your crushes on their Facebook accounts daily in hopes one of them turns single.

You want to go out and when you call all your friends they have plans to go out with their respective partners.

You try to watch a movie with some friends, and you end up watching it after torrenting it instead;
Or you end up in the cinema alone and getting annoyed at the lovey-doves all around you;
Or you second-guess rejecting the guy who tries to make an indecent approach on you in the cinema.

You ask people out to watch the latest movie with you. By the time you find someone to go with you, the movie is already on HBO.

You're literally the odd man out in a group thing. Everyone goes with their S.O.'s, you go alone. Guess who gets to be the driver.

You meet a guy you'd like to know better... but he's already taken In fact, they all are.
...or he's gay.

The last person you held hands with turned out to be a guy.

Your ex-boyfriend is already married and has kids.

Your ex would rather get with a guy who looks like a frog because at least, he's Chinese.
You decide you also want to look like a frog because of that. (I'd rather just be Chinese, yo.)

You go online and look for someone to talk to when you realize that all the people you know are busy with their lovelives.
Or they talk to you... until their S.O. comes along.

You don't have anyone to spend the big holidays with (Holy Week, Undas and Christmas)

It's Valentine's day and all the other girls around you are carrying bunches of roses... so you buy a bunch of roses for yourself.

You plurk and nobody replies

Prostitutes pity you so much, they pay YOU to talk to them.

You send yourself text messages and pretend it's from someone special.
Your ex is around and you pretend to be talking to a significant other on your cellphone
Your ex is around and you pretend to be talking to a significant other on your cellphone -- and then your phone rings!

You keep telling girls you like who find boyfriends na "you're happy for them", but you're stifling a tear.

Your boss doesn't have any compunctions about asking you to do a lot of OT work because she knows you won't have anything else to do anyway.
You actually LIKE to OT because it helps you forget you're alone.

You end up being treated as one of the guys instead of, well, an interesting girl.

You're beginning to envy your old computers. At least sila, meron pa ring compatible.

You begin to hate listening to those Saturday radio programs where people ask for love advice... coz you have nothing to ask advice for.

You contemplate pulling a Mrs. Doubtfire just so you can teach in ICA.

You give a name to one of your pillows, the most huggable of them.
And... You sleep with pillows all around you.

You repeatedly go into malls para magpakapkap sa mga lady guards. (naku! iba yun ah . --Oist, hindi naman lahat dyan, based on experience!)
When you have a picture of your hand in your wallet and you are starting to think about proposing to it.

You get invited to an occasion and others bring their significant others. You bring your younger siblings.

Your idea of a "wild night" is videoke.

When you hear the word date you think of a desk planner and not a person... Hence, March 25 is a "hot date".
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This is from a Plurk thread started by Mistervader and participated in by yours truly, stuplurkdous, KimOfTheWorld, and jesterinexile.

It's still a work in progress, I think. LOL.